A Legacy of Sadness

[The Stage is on Fire] is a page-turner in which, much like life, there are no easy answers and yet each step of the journey yields insight and hope. This work of heart must not be missed!

Melanie Faith

Creative Writing Teacher, Essayist & Poet.

Katie Steedly’s first-person piece [The Unspeakable Gift] is a riveting retelling of her participation in a National Institutes of Health study that aided her quest to come to grips with her life of living with a rare genetic disorder. Her writing is superb.

The Society of Professional Journalists

In recognition of receiving the Dateline Award for the Washingtonian Magazine essay, The Unspeakable Gift.

I thank you … It is the authenticity of your “class notes”; and it is the delicacy and skill with which you present the nuances of classroom life and the actuality of your students’ and fellow teachers’ lives.

Maxine Greene

Philosopher and Education Scholar

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Atlas wasn’t forced to hold up the world.

He was convinced that if he didn’t,

the world would fall. – Mark Nepo

I carry sadness. The kind of sadness that really is bigger than one name or cause. The kind of sadness that immediately, when I think about it, makes my blood boil. (I can go from 0 to 100 in no time at all.) The kind of sadness that makes my anger turn inward and I feel depressed, paralyzed, helpless, and silenced. The kind of sadness that slowly tears at my relationship with my self and others. Sensitivity does not describe it. Moody does not describe it. It feels like the deepest level of empathy with all that is around me.

I have carried sadness for as long as I can remember. I have blown up, shut down, run fast, run slow, bathed in ancient healing waters, climbed the tallest glaciers, prayed incessantly, drank too much, ate too much, shopped too much, and my sadness can’t hold up the world.

What is the legacy of managing sadness over the years.

Laughing Helps

Laughter is light. When heaviness overtakes me, I remind myself to laugh and find joy. I am not sure why it is, but often laughter and joy are low priorities. Perhaps they seem frivolous. Perhaps they don’t play into the “real world” zeitgeist of what is meaningful to do or be. Perhaps they are just too hard to muster when I am down. Laughter is a healthy antidote for sadness.

Old Habits Die Hard

Choosing sadness is an old habit. Choosing sadness allows me not engage with the root of the sadness. Choosing sadness allows me to escape the challenge of behavior change. Choosing sadness can feel comfortable, like a favorite pair of old shoes that look awful, that I have walked 100 miles in, but I still can take them to Good Will.

Change Is Constant

I know I do not have to choose sadness because change is constant. I change. My relationships change. My circumstances change. As constant as some things are, change happens. That is comforting to me. Change can change our perspective on our sadness. Change can make sadness a temporary state. Change can bring us hope.

Choose Love

Love heals sadness. Love is an active choice to channel sadness into something other than negative feelings. I don’t know for sure the root of all the sadness I feel – the world is so big and my boat is so small – but I do know that the simple step of choosing love makes the weight of sadness a little lighter.

https://kitt.global/february-7-a-legacy-of-sadness-mark-nepo-the-book-of-awakening/