“Tonglen reverses the usual logic of avoiding suffering and seeking pleasure. In the process, we become liberated from very ancient patterns of selfishness. We begin to feel love for both ourselves and others; we begin to take care of ourselves and others. Tonglen awakens our compassion and introduces us to a far bigger view of reality.”

Pema Chodron

Chapter 15, “Going against the Grain,” in When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times introduces the concept of tonglen. Chodron explains, “Tonglen practice is a method for connecting with suffering – our own and that which is all around us, everywhere we go. It is a method for overcoming our fear of suffering and for dissolving the tightness of our hearts. Primarily, it is a method for awakening the compassion that is inherent in all of us, no matter how cruel or cold we might seem to be.”

Chodron describes tonglen as the process of breathing in the pain and suffering we see and experience in the world, and breathing out the relaxation and relief we wish to send to the world. In breathing in, we access our own pain and suffering. In breathing out we heal ourselves and others. This can work in individual and collective level. Chodron states, “Tonglen can be done for those who are ill, those who are dying or who have died, those who are in pain of any kind. It can be done as a formal meditation practice or right on the spot at any time. … Breathe in for all of us and breathe out for all of us. Use what seems like poison as medicine. We can use our personal suffering as a path to compassion for all beings.”

Remembering the importance of our breath feels important to me. Suffering impacts us all in so many ways. Illness. Fear. Isolation. Hunger. Sending healing energy from the place in my heart that seeks to heal makes makes sense to me. As sure as I know healing the world begins with healing myself, tonglen makes sense to me.