Relax As It Is

[The Stage is on Fire] is a page-turner in which, much like life, there are no easy answers and yet each step of the journey yields insight and hope. This work of heart must not be missed!

Melanie Faith

Creative Writing Teacher, Essayist & Poet.

Katie Steedly’s first-person piece [The Unspeakable Gift] is a riveting retelling of her participation in a National Institutes of Health study that aided her quest to come to grips with her life of living with a rare genetic disorder. Her writing is superb.

The Society of Professional Journalists

In recognition of receiving the Dateline Award for the Washingtonian Magazine essay, The Unspeakable Gift.

I thank you … It is the authenticity of your “class notes”; and it is the delicacy and skill with which you present the nuances of classroom life and the actuality of your students’ and fellow teachers’ lives.

Maxine Greene

Philosopher and Education Scholar

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Once we know this instruction, we can put it into practice. Then it’s up to us what happens next. Ultimately, it comes down to the question of just how willing we are to lighten up and loosen our grip. How honest do we want to be with ourselves.
Pema Chodron

Chapter 4 of When Things Fall Apart, “Relax As It Is,” focuses on meditation. Right now, meditation is the furthest thing from my mind: there is too much to fear, worry, fret, cuss, hit, kick, punch going on to meditate. Perhaps that is the very reason why I need to practice meditation right now. Trungpa Rinpoche, Chodron’s teacher, metaphorically likens a person who meditates to a person sitting in a fancy costume peacefully holding a spoonful of water without distraction. Meditation allows the surroundings, the costume in this case, not to disturb – to empty the mind. Chodron explains, “thinking,” is cultivating a “gentle friendliness” to whatever arises in your mind.

Chodron offers instructions for meditation. Breath – mindful inhalation and exhalation – are key. We breathe and pay attention to whatever comes up – acknowledge and let thoughts dissolve. Rinpoche suggests six points of posture: Sit flat on the floor. Comfortably cross legs. Hold torso upright with strong back and open front. Hands, eyes, and mouth are softly open. These points create focus and provide a place to return during meditation. Chodron reflects: [after a while] “You just find time each day, and you sit down with yourself. You come back to that breath over and over, through boredom, edginess, fear, and well-being. This perseverance and repetition – when done with honesty, a light touch, humor, and kindness – is its own reward.

I struggle with meditation. I particularly struggle with it right now. I walk myself through the key postures and focus on breath as often as I need and can remember. I think that is the point. The point is not to let life’s costume rattle your spoonful of water too much, and when it does, breathe and calm the water.

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